MYSTERIOUS CREATURE SPOTTED IN JULIAN AREA

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By Miss Terry

April 1, 2020 (Julian) – Around the world, as cities and towns shut down due to the coronavirus pandemic, there are reports of wild animals roaming the streets – from cougars in Colorado to coyotes in San Francisco.  Early this morning, several reports have come in of a mysterious creature first spotted in Ranchita and later, lumbering down Main Street through downtown Julian.

“It looked just like that statute of a yeti in front of the Ranchita store, only with long, dark hair,” said Ida Witness, a Ranchita resident who says she heard her dogs howling shortly before dawn when she went outside and saw the towering, shadowy figure.

A short time later, a man shoveling snow at his cabin in the mountains nearby claims he saw it break into his chicken coop.  “Dang critter helped itself to some fresh eggs for breakfast – and a chicken to boot,” said Buck Shot. “It was walking on its hind legs, like an ape.  I fired my shotgun at it, but it bolted into the woods before I could hit it.”

In downtown Julian, pie maker M.M. Goode was in her shop baking take-out pies when the beast startled her. “It was pressing its nose against the window, like it was hungry,” she said.  “I banged on the glass and scared it off.  It was huge – probably ten feet tall with huge feet, I swear I just saw Bigfoot!”

Sightings of Bigfoot, a.k.a. Sasquatch originated in the Ranchita area of San Diego’s East County years ago, though no sightings have been reported locally in recent decades, as our region’s mountain areas have grown more popular, drawing crowds of tourists for music festivals, snow play, and apple pies.

The Julian Chamber of Commerce issued a statement which reads, “Our request for tourists to stay away to avoid bringing COVID-19 to our community, and the Sheriff’s deputies turning back people coming to frolic in the snow during the stay-home order, have been much appreciated. We hope that the added risk of being ambushed by Big Foot will provide further encouragement for visitors to just stay home.”

Happy April Fool’s Day!

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