April Fools Day

SNAILS INVADE LA MESA

 

By Shelly Trails

April 1, 2014 (La Mesa) –  La Mesa is gearing up for the unveiling of its Centennial Legacy Project – larger than life snail sculptures honoring the area’s species of  snails  (Helix aspersa) for which Mt. Helix was named.  But that’s not all.  Now a local entrepreneur has announced that she will launch “Escargot To Go,” a culinary delivery service specializing in farm-raised snails served up in buttery French tradition. (click "read more" below to read the full story.)

KUMEYAAY CHARTER HIGH TO RISE IN ALPINE

 

By Jack Pott

April 1, 2014 (Alpine) –Alpine parents have finally found a way to build the long-promised high school. 

“The odds of counting on the Grossmont Union High School District were just unwinnable,” said Sal Casamassimo, Chair, Alpine High School Citizens Committee.  “We twice voted for bond measures to build the school, and both times they spent all the money on other projects not even listed in the bond.”

Parents got signatures to divorce from the district and unify with the Alpine Union School District.  But after learning that this process would take several more years, Alpine parents decided to pool their resources and take a gamble—literally. (click "read more" below for full story)

PALA REZ RADIO SPOOFS LISTENERS WITH NEW FORMAT ANNOUNCEMENT

 

Source: Pala Rez Radio 91.3 KOPA

April 1, 2014 (Pala) – “Tuesday is here!  And newly appointed Rez Radio Program Director Olaf Prilos is proud to announce our new format ... Rez Radio LOL.  All comedy, all day long,” reads an announcement issued today by  John Fox, station manager at Rez Radio 91.3 KOPA at the Pala Indian reservation..

The release continues, “In addition to every novelty song you've ever heard and some you probably haven't, Rez Radio LOL will feature standup and comedy bits.  And sprinkled throughout the day, you'll hear not one, but two classic comedy radio series featuring Native American characters ... "The Adventures of the O.B. Ranger" written and performed by Gary Allyn and Neil Ross, and Arigon Starr's creation, "Super Indian" will air in sequence throughout the day.”

TILTING TURBINE? PHOTO SPARKS REACTIONS

 

April 1, 2014 (Ocotillo) – Photographer Jim Pelley posted this photo on his Facebook page, which he stated was shot “early this morning, after very heavy winds last night.”

Ocotillo residents shared reactions to the surreal tilting turbine image, clearly indicating the townspeople’s sentiments about this project.

NEWS FLASH! MAJOR BREAKING STORIES: SPECIAL MESSAGE FOR ALL READERS

 

April 1, 2013—East County Magazine has the exclusive scoop on astounding major stories breaking today.

  • ECM acquires surveillance drone reporter
  • Backcountry towns secede to form new county, create ultimate wildlife preserve
  • Coming attractions: Amusement park, movie studio to replace Grossmont Center
  • San Diegans plan party for "do or die final battle"
  • Anonymous donor buys Julian-Cuyamaca Fire District
  • Jamul Indians to build casino in Jacumba Hot Springs
  • Spotlight El Cajon: F St. Performing Arts Center unveiled

Is truth stranger than fiction? You decide. Be sure to click this hot link  to view these stories in our extra-special April 1st edition. (Trust us, you won't want to miss this news!)  Then click "read more" to open each story and get the full scoop.

ECM ACQUIRES SURVEILLANCE DRONE

 

Special Report by Seymour Crooks

April 1, 2013 (San Diego’s East County)  -- There’s a new reporter on the beat over East County’s skies. Thanks to a generous bequest from an anonymous donor, East County Magazine announces acquisition of a surveillance drone.  Our publication joins a growing number of journalism organizations that seek to deploy drones, as U.S. News recently reported.

BACKCOUNTRY TOWNS SECEDE TO FORM NEW COUNTY, CREATE ULTIMATE WILDLIFE PRESERVE

 

Special Report By Otto B. Free

April 1, 2013 (Jacumvardo)—Three East County communities— Jacumba , Boulevard and Campo, have voted to secede from San Diego County.

“We reject the designation of our region as an energy corridor,” said Donna Tisdale, who will chair a newly elected board of supervisors in the newly formed Jacumvardo County.  “By forming our own County, we are taking back control over our own land use decisions and preserving our rural community character. This move also gives us the opportunity to create a unique economy based on eco-tourism that will assure protection of endangered species--past and present.”

COMING ATTRACTIONS: MOVIE STUDIO, AMUSEMENT PARK TO REPLACE GROSSMONT CENTER

 

Special Report By Opie Taylor

April 1, 2013 (La Mesa)--The Cushman family, owners of Grossmont Center, announced yesterday that the La Mesa Planning Commission has approved plans to revive  La Mesa's historic Flying A Studio as part of their redevelopment plans when the shopping center's lease runs out . The ambitious redevelopment plans combine the movie studio with an amusement theme park that reflects our region’s heritage.  The new development is slated to open to the public for studio tours and amusement park rides in spring 2016.

The first film to be produced at the studio will be Mayberry: The Movie.  Jim Nabors, who played Gomer Pyle in the original TV series, will cut the opening ribbon at Goober's Grub Cafe to be located in the theme park.

SAN DIEGANS PLAN PARTY FOR “DO-OR-DIE FINAL BATTLE”

 

“I’m planning to ride the end-of-the-world wave when those bombs start hitting the Pacific. Cowabunga!” -- Sandy "Surf Dog" Shores

Special Report By Dawn Last

April 1, 2013 (Ocean Beach)-- Hundreds of San Diego residents have flocked to the beach to begin a vigil watching for incoming missiles that the North Korean government announced  it intends to launch against U.S. military bases  in an effort to turn our nation into a “boiled pumpkin,” in the words of dictator Kim Jun Un. 

The U.S. State Department officially maintains that the threats are merely “bellicose rhetoric” and that the missiles can't reach our shores.

Undaunted,  San Diego beach residents are organizing  “an end of the world party to end all parties,” as a flyer posted in Ocean and Mission Beach proclaims. After Kim Jun Un was photographed with a map of possible targets, San Diego  was clearly in the bullseye--a fact not lost on students  eager for any excuse to party over spring break.

ANONYMOUS DONOR BUYS JULIAN –CUYAMACA FIRE DEPARTMENT

 

Special Report By  Rock E. Miner

April 1, 2013 (Julian) – As ECM previously reported, an anonymous donor recently offered a  large donation to end the Julian-Cuyamaca Fire Protection District’s budget gap for this year.  Despite the generous donation, however, the fire district’s board refused to assure townspeople that it would not dissolve the district and hand over firefighting responsibilities to the County.

The board offered to settle the matter with an apple pie-eating contest: winner takes the fire district.  But the citizens refused to participate. So today, the wealthy and determined donor announced a permanent solution to aid this historic mining region.

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