April Fools Day

JAMUL INDIANS SCRAP CASINO PLANS, WILL BUILD CHARGERS STADIUM INSTEAD

 

A little April Fool's Day Fun.

By Horse Feathers

April 1, 2015 (Jamul) – The Jamul Indian tribe today made a surprise announcement, revealing that it has abandoned plans to build a Hollywood-themed Casino and instead reached an agreement with the National Football League (NFL) and Chargers to build a new sports stadium on its six-acre Jamul Indian Village site.

The team will play its nine home games at the state-of-the-art stadium equipped with deluxe sky boxes and adjacent high-rollers lounge, plus seating for 79,000 fans.

Since the stadium will be on tribal land, there won’t be a problem betting on games.  In fact slot machines and gaming tables will be installed throughout the stadium including in the parking lot, where each parking space will be equipped with its own slot machine for ‘tailgate party gambling.’  Inside, each stadium seat will be equipped with “place your bet” buttons.


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PARK STATION REVAMPS PLANS FOR HIGH RISE IN LA MESA

 

A little April Fool’s Day fun.

By Skye High

April 1, 2015 (La Mesa) –After planners twice rejected proposals for an 18-story and 10-story high rise mixed use development at Spring Street and Baltimore Drive in La Mesa, the developers of Park Station have submitted alternative plans  aimed at doing more with less. The new plan will include a vertical cannabis farm, cubicle style hotel, community garden, lounge and rotating restaurant powered by renewable energy.


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LA MESA UNVEILS NEW LANDSCAPING PLAN

 

A little April Fool's Day Fun.

By Barry Pickens

 

April  1, 2015 (La Mesa)—After months of torn-up streets for revitalization of La Mesa’s downtown village, the city has unveiled its new landscaping plan.

“Today we are pleased to announce an Edible Forest for La Mesa,” said Mayor Mark Arapostathis, plucking a ripe apple off a newly planted tree beside city hall.  “All residents are welcome to help plant, harvest, and savor the fruits of these labors.”

One side of La Mesa Boulevard will be planted in grapevines and the other side will feature hops vines, thus sustaining the city’s burgeoning winemaking and craft brewery businesses.  There will also be a community vineyard and hops haven outside the La Mesa community center.


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COUNTY SELLS NAMING RIGHTS TO FIRE TRUCKS

 

A little April Fool's Day fun.

By Betty Burns

April 1, 2015 (San Diego)—Seeking to prevent fire stations from closing again this season due to budget cuts, the County of San Diego announced today that it has sold corporate naming rights to fire trucks.

Hooters Restaurant was the first to sign up for this opportunity, also agreeing to provide Hooters waitresses to serve firefighters at their base camp during wildfires.


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SPECIAL EDITION: BREAKING NEWS APRIL 1, 2014

 

 

 

April 1, 2014—East County Magazine has the exclusive scoop on astounding major stories breaking today.

 

  • Wind turbines to be torn down, replaced with Ocotillo Oasis
  • Snails invade La Mesa
  • Kumeyaay Charter High to rise in Alpine

Is truth stranger than fiction? You decide. Be sure to click this link and SCROLL DOWN to view these stories in our extra-special April 1st edition. (Trust us, you won't want to miss this news!)  Then click "read more" to open each story and get the full scoop.


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WIND TURBINES TO BE TORN DOWN, SITE CONVERTED TO OCOTILLO OASIS

 

 

By Otto B. Happenin

April 1,2014 (Ocotillo) – A federal judge has ordered the Ocotillo Wind Energy Facility to be decommissioned, finding that the project has failed to produce even half of the power promised by its developer, who pocketed huge federal subsidies.  Much to the delight of environmentalists, tribes, and the long-suffering people of Ocotillo, Judge Roland Rock declared, “This is a wind project without wind, plus it's been an ecological nightmare. It’s time to tear it down.  Let’s roll!”

He further ordered Pattern Energy to fund reparations for removing turbines, restoring natural desert habitat and creating enhanced recreational  opportunities for Ocotillo residents. This will include the  Ocotillo Wind River Oasis, a water slide park constructed out of recycled wind turbines. The oasis will also include a golf course, poolside bar, wildlife preserve and live simulcasts of off-road racing events at a new off-site race track.  Hot air balloon rides, wafting on the very gentlest of breezes here, will provide tourists with birds-eye views of desert wildlife. (Click read more below for full story)


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SNAILS INVADE LA MESA

 

By Shelly Trails

April 1, 2014 (La Mesa) –  La Mesa is gearing up for the unveiling of its Centennial Legacy Project – larger than life snail sculptures honoring the area’s species of  snails  (Helix aspersa) for which Mt. Helix was named.  But that’s not all.  Now a local entrepreneur has announced that she will launch “Escargot To Go,” a culinary delivery service specializing in farm-raised snails served up in buttery French tradition. (click "read more" below to read the full story.)


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KUMEYAAY CHARTER HIGH TO RISE IN ALPINE

 

By Jack Pott

April 1, 2014 (Alpine) –Alpine parents have finally found a way to build the long-promised high school. 

“The odds of counting on the Grossmont Union High School District were just unwinnable,” said Sal Casamassimo, Chair, Alpine High School Citizens Committee.  “We twice voted for bond measures to build the school, and both times they spent all the money on other projects not even listed in the bond.”

Parents got signatures to divorce from the district and unify with the Alpine Union School District.  But after learning that this process would take several more years, Alpine parents decided to pool their resources and take a gamble—literally. (click "read more" below for full story)


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PALA REZ RADIO SPOOFS LISTENERS WITH NEW FORMAT ANNOUNCEMENT

 

Source: Pala Rez Radio 91.3 KOPA

April 1, 2014 (Pala) – “Tuesday is here!  And newly appointed Rez Radio Program Director Olaf Prilos is proud to announce our new format ... Rez Radio LOL.  All comedy, all day long,” reads an announcement issued today by  John Fox, station manager at Rez Radio 91.3 KOPA at the Pala Indian reservation..

The release continues, “In addition to every novelty song you've ever heard and some you probably haven't, Rez Radio LOL will feature standup and comedy bits.  And sprinkled throughout the day, you'll hear not one, but two classic comedy radio series featuring Native American characters ... "The Adventures of the O.B. Ranger" written and performed by Gary Allyn and Neil Ross, and Arigon Starr's creation, "Super Indian" will air in sequence throughout the day.”


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TILTING TURBINE? PHOTO SPARKS REACTIONS

 

April 1, 2014 (Ocotillo) – Photographer Jim Pelley posted this photo on his Facebook page, which he stated was shot “early this morning, after very heavy winds last night.”

Ocotillo residents shared reactions to the surreal tilting turbine image, clearly indicating the townspeople’s sentiments about this project.


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