By O. Howe Sweet

April 1, 2012 (San Diego’s East County)—Last month, we reported on a proposal to eliminate all community planning groups, a plan put forth by a “Red Tape Reduction Task Force” of developers appointed by County Supervisors. 

Today, citizen activists and backcountry volunteer community planners announced that they have secured signatures to place their own measure for cutting red tape on the ballot.

By E.Z. Pickens
 

April 1, 2010 (Santee) – The San Diego Chargers have received an offer from the City of Santee to construct a new Chargers stadium in the East County community.
 

“This will be a win-win for the Chargers and East County,” said Santee Mayor Randy Voepel, wearing a sporty bolts blazer. With the upcoming completion of Highway 52, Santee will be easily accessible from all parts of San Diego. Having an NFL team in Santee will not only be good for Charger fans, but will also boost revenues for our city.”

By Skip Tover Grad

April 1, 2010 (San Diego) – After realizing significant savings by eliminating local student admission guarantees, San Diego State University (SDSU) President Stephen Weber has announced a bold new initiative to save taxpayers even more money.
 

“We have decided to eliminate California students altogether,” Weber said. “With the budget crisis, we regret that we just can’t afford to provide an education for kids in our own community or home state."

By Art Rich and Jack Pott

April 1, 2010 (El Cajon) -- Faced with a growing budget gap and boarded up storefronts downtown as a result of the recession, the City of El Cajon announced today that it has sold naming rights to City Hall, Main Street, and the East County Performing Arts Center.
 

“We saw a market opportunity to let these generous corporate partners buy influence AND boost their public images—all perfectly legally,” said Mayor Mark Lewis.

By Biz. E. Bee

April 1, 2010 (La Mesa) -- In these days with everyone looking for bargains, cutting out discount offers from local newspapers, and printing out on-line coupons, the La Mesa Chamber refuses to be outdone. The organization is offering a unique two-for-one offer unheard of in the hemisphere - two of its CEO, Mary England to do the job of the past “one” Mary England. That's right - two of Mary England instead of one.

The Chamber is in negotiations right now to clone England at a laboratory in Northern California. The location of this cloning procedure cannot be revealed as not to draw attention to this process that is not embraced by everyone.

A column written for the East County Magazine
 

“Your guide to financial planning & socially responsible investing”
 

 By Judith L. Seid, CFP ®
President, Blue Summit Financial Group
  

April 1st, 2010 (San Diego) --The rules of finance have changed since the economic collapse that began in October 2008. The global financial crisis, due largely to unregulated corporations engaging in greed-driven behavior, has caused us to re-think what is currently considered good financial advice.
 
So on this April 1st, 2010, I hereby concur that we have a new set of “foolish” financial rules to live by. Here is my top ten list: